Heartstrings

2012-01-12T22:38:00.002-06:00

2011-10-25T19:03:00.001-05:00

Retirement has been a discovery of beauty for me.

I never had the time before to notice

the beauty of my grandkids, my wife,

the tree outside my very own front door.

And, the beauty of time itself.

~Hartman Jule

Congratulations, my sweet Johan ~

Now it's our turn.

love,

Nancy

2011-08-29T15:02:00.000-05:00

I like Google.

I like seeing what other's have created.

Here are two of my favorites.

The one below refers to

reflecting God's love~

2011-07-22T23:16:00.000-05:00

All changes, even the most longed for,

have their melancholy;

for what we leave behind us

is a part of ourselves;

we must die to one life

before we can enter another.

~Anatole France

And my favorite ~

God grant me the serenity

to accept the things I cannot change,

the courage to change the things I can,

and the wisdom to know the difference.

~Reinhold Niebuhr

2011-07-01T02:16:00.000-05:00

Happy Anniversary, my love.

The keeper of my dreams,

the man I pray for.

We have such an exciting time ahead

and I look forward to spending

each and every day of it

with you ~

All my love,

Nancy

2011-06-27T23:12:00.001-05:00

"For everything there is a season,

And a time for every matter under heaven:

A time to be born, and a time to die;

A time to plant, and a time t

pluck up what is planted;

A time to kill, and a time to heal;

A time to break down,

and a time to build up;

A time to weep,

and a time to laugh;

A time to mourn,

and a time to dance;

A time to throw away stones,

And a time to gather stones;

A time to embrace,

And a time to refrain from embracing;

A time to seek, and a time to lose;

A time to keep, and a time to throw away;

A time to tear, and a time to sew;

A time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

A time to love, and a time to hate,

A time for war, and a time for peace."

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

2011-06-15T20:50:00.000-05:00

Soon,

our little ones,

you shall play in the sun,

run from the surf,

and scramble for hermit crabs.

And we, those that love you,

will laugh,

and love,

and linger

in the love.

2011-06-06T12:34:00.000-05:00

I love this print!

It reminds me of all the happy colors of Summer.

I'm not a lover of this season.

But He provides us with such beauty every day.

2011-06-02T04:53:00.003-05:00

My favorite movie.

One of my favorite sayings.

"There's no place like home."

I love vacations,

but I love coming home more.

2011-05-18T20:20:00.000-05:00

Little girls are precious gifts,

wrapped in love serene.

their dresses tied with sashes

and futures tied with dreams.

~ Author Unknown

2011-05-13T17:48:00.001-05:00

It wasn't until I had grandbabies

that I realized,

it's fun to watch them

blow out a candle

over and over and over again;

it's fascinating to watch them

build a tower from Legos

only to knock it down

and laugh with delight;

to see how quickly they learn

where the snack basket is;

to remember what it was like

watching the same cartoons

that I did when I was younger;

to feel delightfully loved

when they fight over your lap;

to see that look of adoration

when they spot your face;

and to see their unabashed love

when they see their parents

walk through our door.

They love me,

and I relish in that fact,

but it thrills me to know

they love their parents more.

Grandchildren?

They are the best parts

of all the ones I love ~

2011-05-08T14:56:00.002-05:00

Jenny, with Noah, her second child

My sweet child,

When I first knew about you,

I wasn't sure if

I was ready for you,

but God knew better.

When I first knew about you,

I was scared that something

somewhere, sometime,

would happen

to take you away from us,

but God knew better.

The instant I saw your tiny face,

I thought that my heart

would burst into millions of pieces

of love and awe and wonder,

all because God knew better.

Happy Mother's Day, Jenny.

I am so honored and thankful

to be called your mother. And thank you

for giving me three precious babies

to love and take delight in.

2011-04-28T20:54:00.000-05:00

The breezes of a new Spring,

the memories of fading Winter,

the hopes of a coming Summer,

the beauty and life of our young ~

2011-04-25T17:21:00.001-05:00

"He arose a victor from the dark domain,

and He lives forever with his saints to reign;

He arose! He arose!

Hallelujah, Christ arose."

2011-04-20T21:10:00.003-05:00

Praying you have most blessed weekend,

filled with love and laughter, giving thanks

to the One we serve and adore ~

Happy Birthday, Nels ~

2011-04-18T22:47:00.000-05:00

The big brother I always needed.

He's on the right. His son's on the left.

Look how tiny they make me look!

Nelson.

I've loved him for 51 years now.

He has my back.

And I have his.

Ian quickly became Nelson's buddy.

I have loved watching his eyes light up when

they are playing. It warms my heart

that they love each other so.

Elle is the same way.

Not quite as much as Ian,

but he can quickly get a smile.

I haven't mentioned Noah.

Early, early on in Noah's young life,

Nelson came in full of life and laughter,

and scared the beejeesuse out of Noah.

He will cautiously approach Nels now,

but always with a foot back ready to run.

Best buddies.

Best friends.

Brothers by different mothers.

The two men in my life I love

more than life itself.

Happy birthday, my beautiful Nelson.

I love you dearly

and treasure our relationship.

Always know, I'm here

and I've got your back (heart font)

much love,

Nancy

2011-04-16T18:38:00.001-05:00

What a comforting feeling to know that at our age, at any age, you're never to young to reach out for that brass ring and grab hold. To make a change, to follow a dream, and not worry that you're too old to do so. Never hold back. Never settle. And always, always make those dreams come true. With His guidance, we all can make dreams come true. Ours is and I pray yours will as well ~

2011-04-05T19:08:00.000-05:00

Sketched by a child that has 'heavenly visions'

Recognized by a four year old that visited heaven

If you haven't read, Heaven if For Real

you will be blessed by doing so.

I'm convinced and I believe.

What a beautiful man,

"that died so we could go see His Father".

It's as simple as this.

2011-03-31T00:01:00.002-05:00

2011-03-25T19:51:00.001-05:00

The baby girl,

of my baby girl.

I am so in love

with both of them.

And always will be.

2011-03-20T17:14:00.001-05:00

Serenity. Not only a pretty word, but it describes a peaceful existence. I have heard others, and read blogs, where words like 'hate' and 'enemies' are used. What sadness to waste life with these emotions. I can honestly say I've never hated anyone. I've been hurt and very disappointed in the actions of others and choices they've made, but I've never hated them. Not even when I was at my lowest in the pain delivered by another. Understanding brings about the peace He speaks of when He tells us to wrap ourselves in His peace and to be calm. For that is when we are able to hear His words of love and comfort. If you've experienced such emotions that you would label as 'hate' or that you have made enemies, please know that you are wasting such precious time. There is more to life than trying to hide behind a life of hatred and lies and making enemies. May all of us live as peacefully as possible until He calls us home to that beautiful Garden where peace abounds. I know I look forward to seeing it again.

2011-03-13T15:15:00.000-05:00

During worship this morning, I heard something I wanted to share with you. Prayer is not all about us talking to God, our heavenly Father. It's also about listening to Him. Listening for Him. You don't have to fill your prayers with your words. Stop and listen for His. Have a blessed week ~

2011-03-07T13:08:00.003-06:00

Spring.

She is on her way.

2011-02-28T17:47:00.001-06:00

"Yet He has not left Himself without testimony: He has shown kindness by giving you rain from heaven and crops in their seasons; He provides you with plenty of food and fills your

hearts with joy.”

~ Acts 14:17

It has been raining off and on today and the earth is being refreshed. I have always loved the various sides of Nature and to see Him cleaning His handiwork and filling the air with the smells of rebirth makes my heart soar. Thank you, my beloved Father, for the infinite blessings of this day.

2011-02-25T11:36:00.000-06:00

I am still confident of this:

I will see the goodness of the Lord

in the land of the living.

~ Psalm 27:13

2011-02-14T21:46:00.000-06:00

"The heart has eyes, which the brain

knows nothing of."

Valentine's Day, 2011

2011-02-11T21:19:00.000-06:00

Everything holds its breath except Spring.

She burst through as strong as ever.

~ B. M. Bower

2011-02-02T20:06:00.002-06:00

"See the sunlight through the pine,

taste the warm of winter wine.

Dream of softly falling snow,

Winter's gold, Aspenglow."

Each and every Winter this song comes to mind. My sister loved John Denver and because of her I paid more attention to his songs. This one is a favorite of mine ~ and I know I speak of this particular song each winter season, but humor me. Here's a link to a YouTube video. It's a beautiful song. Heartfelt, and brings such peace to a season, that to me, is a time for warmth, coziness, quiet, and incredible beauty ~ even in the sight of barren trees and shrubs. I truly hope you are taking the time to see the beauty in His creation for us.

It was you who set all the boundaries of the earth; you made both summer and winter.

~ Psalm 74:17

Winter's Cold

2011-01-14T23:14:00.003-06:00

I love the quietness of winter, the earth lies dormant, waiting.

And while it waits for Spring to burst forth, I take advantage

of good books, good friends, and family. It's a time

of silence to allow us to hear His voice clearly.

I absolutely love Winter and thank Him for this time.

2011-01-07T17:15:00.001-06:00

There are times when we get so caught up in life that we are overwhelmed, frightened, worried beyond belief, and go to sleep and wake up wondering how to solve the problem. He wants us, He urges us to 'be still and know that I am God'. He truly wants us to do this. Wouldn't we want our children to do the same?

This year, this brand new year, I intend to go to Him more often, to thank you more often, and to realize that in all things our cups runneth over. Our blessings far outweigh the sadness, the ugliness, the worrisome ways of our lives. May His blessing be upon us as we enter into this new year with His name on our lips.

2010-12-10T21:28:00.001-06:00

This time of year always feels me with such contentment, such delight, and pure happiness. I always know that it's a very difficult time of the year for many. Two families we know and love will have empty spots in their homes this season and my heart cries for them. They are sheltered and covered with His love, mercy, and grace, but there will be an empty spot until we're gathered together with Him in Paradise. Oh, what a joyful thought. My prayer for you is that you have many, many moments of laughter, lots of loved ones to laugh and reminisce with, and the thankfulness that we can say goodbye to the mistakes and the sad and hard days and hello to a brand new year that is dawning. Merry, merry Christmas, dear ones ~

2010-11-27T19:36:00.000-06:00

Whose woods these are I think I know.

His house is in the village though;

He will not see me stopping here

To watch his woods fill up with snow.

~Robert C. Frost

I love winter, as those who know me can attest,

and I love Robert Frost.

Have a beautiful, wonderous Winter!

A Garden

2010-09-09T22:46:00.001-05:00

The Garden. While looking for another image in Google, I saw this.

My heart grabbed and except for the difference of the horizon

and the flowers to the far right, this was The Garden.

There was no marks of a mower and there was a graveled path

that went from where I stood and curved around to the left.

Going back past the stand of flowers. There wasn't red. Or blue.

But of all the ones I've looked for, this comes the closest.

It's a place I still go to. And wonder when I'll see it again.

2009-06-28T17:40:00.003-05:00

I want to live on this street ~

I want to know those that live here, love here, laugh here ~

Age has nothing to do with it, except

that I cannot go make dreams like this come true ~

there are others now to think of, obligations to consider,

but oh, my dreams still take me here, still stir my soul ~

so I look at pictures such as this and I wonder,

and dream, and ponder, and know that one day

I just might walk down this street. And not in my dreams ~

for it is my dreams of yesteryear that made my life today.

2009-06-14T06:32:00.002-05:00

Ah Ian, I read in my journal last night

that this time six years ago your mother

was about eleven weeks pregnant with you.

I wrote of our excitement and anticipation

of meeting you for the first time~

You have brought such delight to our days, to mine.

You are smart, sensitive, loving, and curious.

You love cartoons, Lego's, and brownies.

Noah brings a bit of angst to your days,

but you humor and tolerate him well~

I see the best parts of your mum and your dad in you.

Your father's laughter, your mommy's love,

all wrapped up with his eyes and her nose.

Watching you and Noah brings such contentment,

such happiness to my soul and I relish

each and every moment with the two of you.

Always know you are loved,

you were prayed for,

you were awaited.

And I?

I shall always be

one of your most adoring fans.

Forever, and a day~

To Austin & Ian, With Much Love ~

2009-05-19T20:53:00.006-05:00

Do not follow where the path may lead.

Go, instead, where there is no path

and leave a trail ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

At commencement you wear your square-shaped mortarboards.

My hope is that from time to time you will let your minds be bold,

and wear sombreros ~ Paul Freund

Be who you are and say what you feel,

because those who mind don't matter

and those who matter don't mind ~ Dr. Seuss

~~~~~~~

Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss,

you'll land among the stars ~ Les Brown

~~~~~~~

and my favorite,

Wherever you go,

go with all your heart ~ Confucius

Oh my beautiful grandsons, you are loved dearly, prayed over daily, and watched over keenly. There are so many delightful days ahead for you, go boldly into Life and know you will fare well.

A Pocketful of Sunshine

2009-03-09T01:39:00.002-05:00

See this smile? It is genuine.
And I got to see it recently,
on a trip to the Gulf Coast.
You may remember,
those of you that follow along,
a post on Heartstrings.
She was venturing into life again.
Bravely, boldly, hopefully.
And now ~
This precious friend of mine,
has met someone;
and he has brought delight,
smiles, & laughter to her days.
To add to this journey of hers,
she has sold her home & is making
the dream of living on the Gulf Coast
her reality, her life.
And she smiles ~
Thank you, Richard, for coming into her life.
From those of us that know and love her,
we welcome you into our homes
our hearts, and we look forward
to many years of laughter,
trips together, and knowing
the one we love
has found someone to love ~

2009-01-29T20:22:00.004-06:00

Above his head they placed

the written charge against him:

this is Jesus, the king of the jews.
Matthew 27:37

My child, I've seen your tears

as you read of My death.

Never forget that I died

for all people everywhere.

My own rejected Me because they

did not understand who I was.

When they ask, I will forgive them,

just as I have forgiven you.

Remember always, you are royalty.

You are a child of the King.

Daily in Your Presence~

2009-01-20T12:56:00.005-06:00

He was her son, his brother, a friend to many.

He was a former student, a bright

and engaging personality.

It came to an abrupt end at some point this weekend

and we are left with questions and tears.

Kirk loved and was loved.

His death brings us to our knees

and to the arms of each other.

Death can be cruel but it loses its power

when we reach out to others

and turn toward the One that cries with us.

I have long loved the sculpture of the Weeping Angel

and thought of it when I got the news last night

that Kirk is no longer a part of our world.

He will remain in our hearts, our memories,

but he no longer will be on the end of the phone

or share life with family and friends.

We will cry and we will miss him.

We have lost too many in this little community,

in this tight knit place.
My heart aches and hurts for the pain

his mother is enduring. And will forever live with.

The weeping angel. Heaven is aware.

He cares and comforts.

And oh, oh, how we need that now~

2009-01-01T18:44:00.001-06:00

No eye has seen,
nor ear has heard,
nor the human heart conceived,
what God has prepared
for those who love him.

~1 Corinthians 2:9

2008-12-29T22:26:00.005-06:00

See the sunlight through the pine

Taste the warm of winter wine

Dream of softly falling snow

Winterskol, Aspenglow

As the winter days unfold

Hearts grow warmer with the cold

Peace of mind is all you know

Winterskol, Aspenglow

Aspen is a life to live

See how much there is to give

See how strongly you believe

See how much you may receive

Smiling faces all around

Laughter is the only sound

Memories that can't grow old

Winterskol, Aspenglow

Words and music by John Denver

Aspenglow was written about Aspen, which is a resort town in Colorado. They have a celebration every year called Winterskol where many skiers come down the mountain holding torches, thus the Aspen glow.

Merry Christmas, everyone~

2008-07-04T10:30:00.003-05:00

I guess we all have things in our past that create pain, confusion, and hurt in our present and threaten the future. I know I do. Things I kept hidden, you know kind of like a box collecting dust on a closet shelf. Every so often you take a tiny peek to make sure it's still there, then quickly close it and shove it back into the darkness. Maybe that's why I always felt a kindred spirit with certain children and with women that were forced to give what only belonged to them. If you're one of these, you know what I'm talking about without any further words. If you're at a loss and don't have a clue, then I hope it never happens to you and that you never read words like these and think, 'it happened to her, too'.

My devotional today uplifted me and reminded me of the pain He feels when we hurt. He reminds us that the freedom of speaking out, dealing with it, letting go, and moving on is what frees us to step boldly into the future. He is our future. Continuing to hold on and grieve for what was lost only keeps us in the past. And the present is here for such a brief moment in time. I have had the support of a loving family and a Christian counselor, which with my King's unending love, has brought a peaceful ending to the past. The words went something like this~

True freedom is not the absence of conflict, nor is it the release from authority. He came to bring us freedom: freedom from the past that would hold us prisoner; and freedom to embrace the future and all He created us to be. He is our freedom, and His Spirit will bring the truth that frees us to love and forgive. We find true freedom when our past becomes a stepping-stone to a brighter tomorrow.

I pray that, along with me, you release the pain and hurt from the past and step boldly into His arms. In doing so, we are not slaves to those that attempt to control and to hurt. I am a child of the King and I lift my head high and look upwards to what I know awaits me.

2008-06-22T01:22:00.006-05:00

This snapshot reminded me

of this snapshot~Little boys have heroes~

and some dads,

really love

being dads~

2008-06-13T12:25:00.006-05:00

And I will pray the Father,

and he shall give you another Comforter,

that he may abide with you for ever.

John 14:16 kjv

From the Father's Heart ~ My child, I know when your heart is breaking, when you've said good-bye to the last dreams of your heart. I'm here for you, and I will hold you as long as you need to rest in My arms. My Spirit is ever present as the Comforter to speak peace to your heart and soul. In every sorrow, and for every tomorrow, I will be there. No one else can make that promise to you.

A Grateful Response ~ Lord, I never need to look farther than the comfort of Your arms. There You wait for me with expectant heart, longing for my fellowship. How many times I've felt Your strong arms and quiet whispers to my aching heart! Where else could I turn? Lord, You are my Comforter.

Simple Truth~ Just when we think all hope is gone, Jesus fills our hearts with song.

Today, as I was reading my daily devotional,

I remembered the grief stricken families

of the Scouts killed in the tornado.

I remembered the family of Audrey Caroline

and Luke of Bring the Rain.

Our Lord is our Comforter,

He is so in love with us,

and He promises

to always always be there for us.

What else, who else, do we need~

2008-06-08T19:37:00.005-05:00

I look at these little ones,

and I see

the good parts of me,

and sweet shades of him~

And, of course,

the best parts of them.

Parts that will nurture

these little ones

to grow to be

mirrors of all of us.

And I know

that no matter where they go

or who they grow to be

or how they get there

they will always be

the best parts of those I have loved.

Little pieces of our hearts,

our souls,

our lives,

walking around

in another time,

another century,

another life.

And so we continue

to love,

to laugh,

to live~

2008-06-01T23:28:00.003-05:00

I wonder

if she knows,

this child of mine,

just how much

I watch her.

And laugh.

And learn.

This life,

the one I dreamed of

for myself,

the one I prayed

for her.

The one she now holds

close, and tight,

to her heart.

Boldly she steps forth

to embrace,

to laugh,

to learn.

With him there,

she's never alone.

So I watch,

and I wish,

and I am thankful.

I am so thankful.

2008-05-28T08:46:00.002-05:00

I am my beloved's,and my beloved is mine.

~Song of Solomon 6:3 kjv

From the Father's Heart: My child, we have a wonderful love relationship that I want to guard at all costs. I am your beloved, and I feel the same way about you. In that sacred romance, I long for you to stay close to Me. There is no one else who will meet your needs like I will. There is no one who will ever love you like I do. Come, sit beside Me. I love to share My inmost secrets with you.

A Grateful Response: Your love is like no other, Lord. With You, there is a belonging and a warm sense of security. I love to walk and fellowship with You in the cool of Your garden, or by the warmth of a fire. When You speak, my heart and spirit leap to join my beloved One. Wherever You are, Lord, is where I want to be.

Simple Truth: If love were heaven's only gift, it would be enough.

Please go to Christianity.Com to sign up for a daily devotional. To spend additional time with His Word and Love is only a good thing~

He Was

2008-05-09T01:41:00.006-05:00

He was the first thing I noticed,

standing there just off the path.
I curled my toes inward, I remember,

not sure why I did though~
maybe to make sure it was real?
The gravel was the small kind,

a bit rounded, not sharp~
but He says there's no pain, right?

He looked younger, healthier.
I don't remember him ever looking such.
Watering various heights of cascading flowers~
he loved his flowers

and bored us by giving saplings or seedlings

or seeds from huge conifers he found out West~
the ones I wish now I'd saved.

There didn't seem to be a sun,
although it was bright, a fresh kind of light.
The breeze on my face was so perfect,

not hot, not even warm,
but not cold nor cool~just perfect.
Although I saw the others there,

it was him I wanted to see,

this time that seemed to last for minutes~
but then, only moments.

There was a time
when I thought back to the one I left,
yet there was no sorrow~
but He tells us that too, doesn't He?
I knew where I was, I knew I wanted to go to him,
to be closer~but I couldn't.

Not yet. I had to come back.

Come back and share the beauty that is there,
what perfect health looks like,
that what we read is beyond what we can imagine.
One day, though, one day I'll go back~
and I'll hug my dad.
Then we'll sit at the feet of the King.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

My daddy~

November 27, 1929 - July 3, 2004

2008-04-22T16:43:00.002-05:00

Remember these

in the daily papers?

I was involved

in a long distance romance

when these were new.

I think I cut out

and saved each one,

taping them carefully

in a scrapbook,

those that I didn't include

with a love letter to Georgia.

What giddy young feelings surfaced

finding this today,

and realizing

the romance may be over

but the love,

a bit of it

will always

be there.

2008-04-16T20:43:00.002-05:00

My hands were busy through the day

I didn't have much time to play

The little games you asked me to,

I didn't have much time for you.

I'd wash your clothes, I'd sew and cook,

But when you'd bring your picture book

And asked me please to share your fun,

I'd say, "A little later, son."

I'd tuck you in all safe at night

And hear your prayers, turn out the light,

Then tiptoe softly to the door . . .

I wish I'd stayed a minute more.

For life is short, the years rush past . . .

A little boy grows up so fast.

No longer is he at your side,

His precious secrets to confide.

The picture books are put away,

There are no longer games to play,

No good-night kiss, no prayers to hear,

That all belongs to yesteryear.

My hands, once busy, now are still.

The days are long and hard to fill.

I wish I could go back and do

The little things you asked me to.

~author unknown

2008-04-14T21:19:00.001-05:00

There are times

when words are better left

unspoken

2008-04-08T01:25:00.004-05:00

Old photos have always captured my attention. And my imagination. Why would an old photo be relinquished to strangers? How did it get outside the family realm? Who are they? They loved, they laughed. They lived. What did they dream of and did they live long enough to see those dreams take flight? What memories did they leave in the hearts of those that knew them?

There's a blog I frequent, and just recently found, that offers images to those that might find some creative use for them. I have no thoughts of being crafty and reusing this, preferring instead to study it and let my thoughts wander.

They don't look that far back into the past, yet clothing tells us about a particular period. The half smiles on their faces let us know they are comfortable and at ease. What were they thinking as they stood there?

I've chosen a few others for you to gaze upon and let your mind take you to another time, another place. What do you find yourself thinking as you see these children? When I found the class shot, I immediately thought, "I wonder how many of these became doctors or pursued politics? How many became mothers, nurses, teachers?" Leave me a comment or two and share your thoughts with me. And as always, may we all find moments to love, times to laugh, and to live as if this were our last day on earth~

The Look~

2008-03-31T22:31:00.005-05:00

I love how she looks into the camera. Looks at me with laughter in her smile and that little gleam of adventure in her eyes. Her hands clasped, but not tightly. Just enough to let her know that she still has a hold on life. Note the little finger, the one that's a bit separated from the rest. One might say that she is beginning to relax and enjoy what life is bringing her way. You'd never know that just a little over two years ago her world fell apart. Changed. Forever. The future was rewritten.

They were high school sweethearts. He didn't just love her, he adored her. They married, he joined the Air Force, and they traveled. Saw places most of us only dream of seeing. Visited ruins and castles. Brought two beautiful children into the world. A boy, named after his father, and a daughter. A perfect family. There are no perfect families. Each have their own trials. Children move through the teenage years, finances get tight, and so on.

Throughout it all, though, they pampered each other, supported each other, and lived to help the other. They were close to the King and found such pleasure in their church family. They worshipped together. And it was so good.

The children grew up, married and moved away. Empty nesters now, he brought her breakfast in bed each and every Saturday. Those of us that knew and loved them would tease, wanting such treatment ourselves. And we watched the way he looked at her, following her with his eyes. We spoke, amongst ourselves, of the love that was so evident, so real, so absent in today's world. And they planned. They planned for their future,

their retirement and the golden years. Saving their money over the years, they'd managed to have almost enough to purchase a bed and breakfast ~ something they'd dreamed of over the years of traveling and staying in homes across the world. They were so well suited for it and we knew they would find not only success with this venture, but that they would delight in the strangers that crossed their threshold. Then,

he began to feel bad. For someone so healthy, so in shape, we worried. After too many tests, too many doctors, and too little time, a diagnosis was given. The news wasn't good. In fairy tales, it is. In the real world, it seldom is. And so they planned not for the golden years,

but for the years they would be apart. Now living each day became a challenge. So much to do, and so little time. For him, it was to make sure she would be well taken care of, that she understood how the household would need to be maintained, and he tried, oh how he tried, to prepare her. She lived trying to make it easy for him, being strong for him, letting him know each and every moment how she loved him, had loved him, and would always love him. They took a last trip together, to Canada, to a quaint bed and breakfast and fell in love all over again, as if it were the first time. And we watched.

We watched as they both withered away. He with the cancer, and she with the ever present knowledge that he was leaving. And so he did, on New Year's Eve, 2005. She woke the first day of a new year without him. And we celebrated his life with a memorial service in the middle of a raw and cold January. And our hearts stung from the unfairness of it all. They, who were so in love, so true to each other and to their feelings, to be separated so soon. More than one of us would have traded places with him. He left this earth, and she woke each morning without him.

The first year was harder than she ever thought it could be. Staying busy, staying focused, wondering how she would get up the next morning. But she did. She learned so much that first year without him beside her, in the physical sense of the word. He did well in preparing her for this, but how do you teach someone to live without you. How do you really teach that? And she grew.

Slowly, day by day, she began to draw strength from the memories and, dropping the cloak of heaviness, she allowed Him to wrap her in comfort and guidance. Once again, she began seeing the beauty and freshness of Life that had dimmed with the news of his illness. She found that laughing didn't mean he was forgotten, that smiling at another didn't mean she was disloyal, and that life doesn't stop with dying. We who knew them know that he would be so proud.

So she looks at me, with laughter in her smile and that little gleam of adventure in her eyes. Her hands are clasped, but not tightly. Just enough to let her know that she still has a hold on life. She is happy. She is strong. And she plans.

2008-03-28T13:07:00.003-05:00

"Look at the land with your own eyes, since you are not going to cross this Jordan. But commission Joshua, and encourage and strengthen him, for he will lead this people across and will cause them to inherit the land that you will see."
~Deuteronomy 3:27b-28

Moses led the people of Israel out of Egypt and in the wilderness, but did not get to enter into the Promised Land becauseof his sin. Yet, for all those years, Moses nurtured and prepared the person who would do what he could not do. That person was Joshua. Who are you training, molding, encouraging, motivating, and calling to do what you won't be able to do? What successor will take your dreams farther than you can? Who is your Joshua?

This was my devotion today from Heartlight and it made me stop and wonder. Powerful words, sobering thought. So, who is YOUR Joshua?

2008-03-27T21:43:00.004-05:00

i believe in pink, i believe that

laughing is the best calorie

burner. i believe in kissing,

kissing a lot. i believe in being

strong when everything seems

to be going wrong. i believe

that happy girls are the

prettiest girls. i believe

that tomorrow is another day & i

believe in miracles.

~audrey hepburn

2008-03-19T00:57:00.004-05:00

How wide is Your love

That You would stretch Your arm

And go around the world
And why for me would a Savior's cry be heard

I don't know

Why You went where I was meant to go

I don't know

Why You love me so

Those were my nails

That was my crown

That pierced Your hands and Your brow

Those were my thorns

Those were my scorns

Those were my tears that fell down

And just as You said it would be

You did it all for me

After You counted the cost

You took my shame, my blame

On my cross

How deep is Your grace

That you could see my need

And chose to take my place

And then for me, these words I'd hear You say

Father no

Forgive them for they know not what they do

I will go

Because I love them so

~On My Cross by FFH

2008-03-13T14:40:00.003-05:00

I love this picture. Happiness, total abandonment of joy. Ian, playing soccer with his dad, in the sunshine of youth. Oh to be able to capture that feeling of agelessness once more. That feeling that there's no tomorrows, just the glorious moment at hand. I choose to live more moments in just this way. Thanks, Jen, for sharing this picture, but moreso for reminding us we need to give the child in us a chance to come forth.

2008-03-05T17:58:00.001-06:00

"I cannot live without books" ~ Thomas Jefferson

2008-03-04T01:47:00.002-06:00

Be not forgetful to entertain strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares. ~Hebrews 13:2

I feel very strongly, even moreso since the accident, that angels are near, especially during times when they are most needed. I also feel very strongly that we need to take the time to acknowledge them and to thank God for their presence. Let's rid ourselves of the scales the world has put upon our eyes and pray that He allow us to witness these heavenly beings He sends to help, to comfort, and to guide. They don't have to be in white robes with strong wings attached behind the shoulders. She may be sitting beside you in the doctor's office when you're afraid and weary; he may help you with a dropped package in the grocery line; who said, who wrote that they have to be anymore than what we need at that time? The next time you open your eyes after a prayer, leave them open so you can witness His work. And may you continue to remain fascinated by this beautiful earthly home, for you won't believe how much more Paradise is~

2008-02-27T23:11:00.004-06:00

for just one day, one moment even, if I could just hold her in my arms again and feel her short legs, ripe with babyfat, wrap around my waist. to have her soft curly hair brush my face as she nuzzles in closer to my neck and I smell that milky breath that, to this day, I know in my dreams. to have her pull Baby Fields closer to our hearts that are separated merely by the clothes we wear and to know that she is already learning to love. I sing and murmur love songs, songs that will lull her into that place known as Sleepy Town, where best friends are the ones with floppy ears, loved coats, and sometimes missing an eye, or a leg. Maybe this is our saving grace~these memories. To right all the times we were too impatient, too busy, too absent. Maybe these times of rocking chairs, lullabies, stolen kisses on the eyelids and nuzzles of the neck~memories take hold and we savor them and wish, oh how we wish, to have them once more. Just. One. More. Time. it is because of you that I believe in miracles~

2008-02-20T19:53:00.005-06:00

So I ran across this, right, while reading through a favorite blog of mine and clicked on it just out of curiosity! Here's my fairie name. I thought it ironic and oh so neat that it's the fairy that loves Winter, just as I do! What's your fairy name?!

Your fairy is called Berry Goblinfrost

She is a bringer of riches and wealth.

She lives in fruit orchards and vineyards.

She is only seen during the first snow of winter.

She wears red, cerise and purple berry colours. She has gentle green wings like a butterfly.

Get your free fairy name here!

2008-02-19T21:44:00.003-06:00

My birthday is this month and it's been such a happy time thus far. And the best thing is that it's only getting better. I'm becoming more comfortable with knowledge that I won't be returning to my classroom next schoolyear. Johnny is truly enjoying having me home and I get to see so much of Jenny and her family. There's been more time for friends, more time to read, to rest, to just walk outside and listen to the wind. Life is so fragile and that was deeply impressed upon me during the recovery period. What we can't change must be accepted, dealt with, and a way found to enjoy the difference. I do believe I'm finding it. And it's a very peaceful acceptance.

2008-02-13T20:24:00.000-06:00

It Happened

2008-02-07T23:50:00.003-06:00

Earlier this evening I came across something I've never seen before. Four pages of paper with scribbling and phrases written on both back and front. I don't recall ever seeing them, but I was the author. They were among some papers in a drawer of our desk and were written in the days immediately following the accident. I do not feel like going into the scribblings nor all of the phrases. They hurt too much. I do want to tell you, though, of one~

"I saw ddy"

this one written phrase ripped through my heart. Proof that I did see him, that I did want to go to him, and that I was sent back. Proof that the accident did happen, that it changed our lives, that it is in the past, and that life does go on. But it hurts and I don't think crying will ever make it go away.

2008-02-02T21:41:00.000-06:00

It's my birthday month!

and you know what?

I think I'll celebrate all month!

2008-01-28T23:38:00.000-06:00

I intend to do just that. Every day, for the rest of my life~

2008-01-26T22:31:00.000-06:00

A dear friend of ours made a recent trip to Moscow and took some amazing pictures. This one struck me for several reasons. First of all, it's amazing in the colors and ornate touches. And yet this was built in a communist country where beauty was not shared with everyone~only the elite. Secondly, that I would never have expected to see a building like this in Moscow. I had a very different image of Moscow and her architecture. Snapshots such as this one caused me to go online and look at other buildings just as ornate, just as colorful. Thanks, Jim France, for bringing this new knowledge and beauty to my world~

2008-01-18T18:09:00.000-06:00

A dear friend sent a video that just touched my heartstrings and I wanted to share it with you. Apparently this is someone that is trying out much like the American Idol show and this is his act, if you will. It's on YouTube and I hope you can just click and see it. I think he has talent and what is sung has always been one of my favorite songs for decades. In fact, it was played at our Jenny's wedding and brought tears to many. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did and that it brings a smile to your heart just as it did to mine. And as always, may you have a very blessed tomorrow~
Terry Fator, What a Wonderful World

2008-01-14T00:24:00.000-06:00

This image grabbed my heart. And wouldn't let it go. O precious Lord, how great Thou Art.

2008-01-06T12:04:00.000-06:00

A friend of mine, Angela Reese, took this picture as she and her family were hiking Rag Mountain in Virginia. Never heard of the area, but when I saw this snapshot of a creek they crossed, it hit me~our sins and our past wash away just as this water flows over its stones and debris. I love the way God uses subtle nudges to remind us of His presence and His love. There are times I feel so insignificant and unworthy of all that He has provided for. What an awesome, awesome Father I worship and adore.

If you read my family blog, you already know that Friday afternoon was heartrending for us. It is still resounding through our hearts and minds. We took time today to just be alone and allow Him to comfort us and for us to acknowledge the many blessings we've received. We know He is in control; we know He will prevail; and we know, without a shadow of doubt, that He will continue to bless us even with the challenges thrown at us. Just like the stones and debris this water flows over, He will continue to take us over the obstacles. Thank you, Father, for loving us so much~I shall continue to praise you and tell others how great You are.

2007-12-31T22:29:00.000-06:00

2008~it's going to be a really great year. I've decided that. And deciding is half the battle. We have a choice each day. To make it better, or to wallow in everything that's wrong. I have bad days. I have days where I can't speak without stuttering and days where I can't remember words or put sentences together. Those are the days I try to stay alone so that I don't have to see pity and sympathy in the eyes of those that love me. Johnny wants to think these days will get better. I think it's going to be a way of life for us~the 'new me', if you will. If it passes, great! If it doesn't, then we'll deal with it. Either way, it will be our choice.

My dad used to say there are only two things we have no control over. We all have to die, and we all have to pay taxes. Everything else is a choice. There will be things out of our control and actions will happen that we can't stop. But what we can do is control our reactions to them. Do I have regrets? Shoot yeah, but because of my choices, I am the person I am today. And although that person isn't perfect, I like her. She's stronger, she's more intuitive to another's pain, and she's far wiser than she was a few years ago.

Dad also used to say, "time stops for no man". It doesn't. As much as I wanted time to stand still so I could hold on to Jenny and capture forever that sweet smell behind her right ear, I couldn't. As much as I wanted time to stop so I could tell my grandmother just one more time how much I loved her, I couldn't. And as much as I wanted to hold my dad in my arms as he crossed over, I couldn't. Time marches on. And it carries us with it. We can, however, choose the walk.

I choose to put my hand firmly in His; my footsteps directly within His; and, my eyes on the beautiful place I know is there. I am so excited with this new year. There is this feeling in my soul that says it's going to be such an awesome time for our family that I simply can't wait to see how God is going to present it all to us. May 2008 be just as good for you~

2007-12-30T00:03:00.000-06:00

This was on Susanne's blog and I wanted to share it with you~

2007-12-25T22:47:00.000-06:00

These two sweethearts came into my life March of 1983~and they've remained through laughter and tears, challenges and victories, births and funerals, and the beauty and sadness of life in general. They have blessed my life in ways they'll never realize and brought smiles to my heart when it needed comfort. I know now, as a parent, I can look back and wish things had been different, words had been said or not, actions been done or left undone~but through it all they have grown and matured into beautiful young ladies . I am so blessed and so proud to be a part of their life. Stacey, Leslie, I promise to always be near, to always love you, and to always cover you in prayer.

2007-12-19T00:31:00.000-06:00

Nativity scenes. I've always loved them. Growing up, we had one that my father brought back when he returned from overseas. It was very simple, just Mary, Joseph, the baby, and an angel. One cow and a sheep, that over the years lost a leg. I loved finding it when mother would bring it out of the attic with the other decorations. Now, I don't know where you worship or what you believe, but as my father aged he began to resent seeing nativity sets during the Christmas season. He had his reasons and they were valid. To a point.

I know we should celebrate His birth each day and that we should also celebrate His death, because in dying, He arose. I know all that and I believe it wholeheartedly. But, in his attempt to get the point across to us, he didn't want Christmas carols sung either. To do so, in his eyes, would be to appear worldly. And in his swing away from the scriptures the World tried to place on Christmas, he missed the whole point of what a beautiful story it is. And if this is the only time that most of our world ever takes the time to hear it, then we need to share it. And not be afraid.

While shopping with Jenny downtown recently, we came across a beautiful nativity set. She asked Ian who the baby was. He promptly said, "Moses!" She couldn't get him to say it was the baby Jesus. Now I don't think that's any fault of Brandon nor Jenny. I thought it showed knowledge on Ian's part that there was another biblical figure who's story began as a baby! But sadly, this is the only time each year that some children see parents hovering over a baby in a straw manger, with animals nearby, shepherds, and men bearing gifts. I'm sure they ask questions and I pray that they are given a patient answer, if no other than "that's how Jesus was born". And just maybe from that planted seed, more questions will follow and someday someone will have the answers to bring them to the Lord.

Share the nativity story. Share it with the holiness it deserves, the excitement of this miracle, and sing with feelings the beautiful hymns normally reserved for this time of year. And may your Christmas be filled with His peace, His grace, and His mercy. And if you have questions of your own, I pray that you will find someone to help you with the answers.

2007-12-11T01:01:00.001-06:00

I remember getting up long before daylight and thinking no one would hear me if I crept very quietly to the Christmas tree. Did I really think mother wouldn't hear me?!

I remember just quivering with excitement and wondering what would greet us when we were finally allowed to get up and go to the tree. You see, Santa didn't wrap any presents so gifts were always laid out with such care. The only wrapped presents would be taken later to grandparents and cousins. Oh the awe of that first sight of everything Santa brought!

I remember thinking that in the pre-dawn light, a tree couldn't look more beautiful. That is until~I saw our Christmas tree mirrored in my young daughter's eyes. Then I realized the real meaning of the magic of Christmas.

2007-12-07T20:07:00.000-06:00

President Franklin D. Roosevelt: Yesterday, December 7, 1941 - a date which will live in infamy. The United States Of America was suddenly and deliberately attacked by Naval and Air Forces of the Empire of Japan. It is obvious that planning the attack began many weeks ago, during the intervening time the Japanese Government has deliberately sought to deceive the United States by false statements and expressions of hope for continued peace. The attack yesterday on the Hawaiian Islands has caused severe damage to American military forces, I regret to tell you that over three thousand American lives have been lost. No matter how long it may take us to over come this pre-meditated invasion, the American people in their righteous might will win through to absolute victory. Because of this unprovoked, dastardly attack by Japan, I ask that the congress declare a state of War.

Admiral Yamamoto: I fear all we have done is to awaken a sleeping giant.

2007-11-30T16:39:00.000-06:00

There are moments in your life that make you

and sets the course of who you're going to be.

Sometimes they're little, subtle moments.

Sometimes, they're big moments you never saw coming.

No one asks for their life to change, but it does.

It's what you do afterwards that counts.

That's how you find out who you are.

{Thank you, God, for never leaving me alone

during the big moments when I needed you

and the little moments

when I only thought I did it by myself.}

2007-11-22T15:32:00.001-06:00

It's Thanksgiving and I want to thank you, John, for being the one I always dreamed of. You bring such joy to my life and a stability to the world. Thank you for being more than just my husband, I cannot imagine life without you. forever and a day, me~

2007-11-21T22:30:00.000-06:00

My heart is in tatters. I learned earlier this evening that at a time when I most needed to recognize someone, I didn't. Apparently, I looked into his eyes and right through them. So busy with gathering up a group of second graders and lost in my thoughts, the moment passed that would have brought needed joy to both our hearts. He remembers it. I don't. I was never aware we were within hugging distance, close enough to speak, close enough to acknowledge. I am so sorry, dear one. I never knew. And now that I do, I don't know what to say.

A lesson for us all~take the time. Always, always take the time to look at someone. Not through them. The flip side to this would be, don't ever be hesitant to reach out.

2007-11-04T22:41:00.000-06:00

This afternoon I took it upon myself to clean some areas that had long needed organizing. In doing so, I found items that enveloped me with memories of yesteryears. Old love letters and notes passed in class brought back the sweetness of first loves, stolen kisses, and dreams of a young girl in love. Snapshots revealed more than just the people in the pictures~sounds, smells, and conversations tumbled in around my heart. Reading through old school newspapers caused me to stop and wonder where those people are now, and if they are happy.

And then the phone rang. It was Johnny. My Johnny. The man that loves the woman I am today. The man that has stayed in love with her for almost 25 years. Maybe not the starry~eyed love that I felt so many years ago, but he brings a love that I know will last. I find it comforting that he still brings butterflies to my tummy when I see him across a room. When his eyes meet mine, I love the way his smile is for me, and for me alone. We didn't know each other during those high school years or the adventurous college days. We met after broken hearts and shattered dreams had dimmed the notion of true love. After the toll of stressful adult life made us wonder if dreams were really meant to come true.

Late at night, after our daughter was fast asleep in bed, and I was trying to get everything ready for the next day, he would come to me. He would find me and bring me into the kitchen, where the radio was. And he would dance with me. It became an endearing part of our relationship. Long after our children were grown and gone, long after housework became less important, and long after our youth faded, this man, this beautiful man, still dances with me. We still dance in the kitchen.

2007-10-20T23:27:00.000-05:00

Trust. Small word. Big idea. Jenny posted this tonight on their family page and the look on Noah's face grabbed hold of my heart. I know he's looking at his mommy. I know how dearly this child loves that woman. And I know how much he depends on her. For many months she was his food source, his pacifier, his hiding place. He knows nothing more than to feel safe with her and to trust her totally and completely.
It's difficult for me to remember trusting anyone this much. As we age, we grow cynical and trusting others doesn't come as easily as the hurts of life begin to accumulate. I love my daughters and I adore my husband. And I trust them. But not as much as the look in this little man's eyes as he gazes at his mother. Which makes me somewhat sad. We lose so much as we age.
There is one that I can trust and always feel safe. Within my heavenly Father's hands I know everything will be alright. That whatever I need and whatever happens will happen only within His realm and I can rest knowing that He is always there, always loving, always safe.
Hold on to this look, dear Noah, for as long as you can. And as you age, know that you can always trust your mother and father. And you can trust me, sweet child. I'll be here, forever and a day~

Imagine

2007-10-10T21:10:00.001-05:00

Imagine if you will, an utterly beautiful day. An April morning. It's Friday and you have the day off! You are filled with such peace and happiness you almost can't stand it. A day of laughter. And love. You're strong, you're in control, you're invicible. You're safe.

Now, during this beautiful day, it's time for a nap! You're comfortable, relaxed. 'Just lie here for 30 minutes'. Easy. You drift away.

Dreams come and go, haunting, scary. Your fears wrapped up in everything that's ever made you uncomfortable. They're so real. So real and so frightening. Finally, finally, you wake and there's your best friend, your lover, your rock. And you begin to relax. Wow, what a dream, you say. And you notice, you're not lying where you were, but that's okay. It's not really a problem. Yet.

Tubes, wires, bandages, something attached to your throat that prevents you from talking, breathing. Panic begins to rise, and fear clogs your throat. Swiftly your brain races to find some logic to connect the pieces of this horrible puzzle that's becoming your reality.

Throwing back the covers, you find temporary relief that your legs look normal. While getting out of bed, someone has to catch you as you slide to the floor. Who do those legs belong to? Not you! You just tried to walk. And couldn't.

You ask, 'what's happened?' 'What day is it?' And you feel his anguish before you see his tears. You hear, but you don't comprehend. 'That's, what? 77 days?' He doesn't need to nod because you feel it inside with a sinking, sinking feeling. Something is wrong. Something is horribly, horribly wrong. Seventy-seven days? Of your life? When? How? What happened? And this is only the beginning.

2007-10-03T00:00:00.000-05:00

Does our heart not melt at the sight of a sleeping child? Do we not remember with clarity the smell of their freshness, the soft whisper of their breathing, and the way they fold into us when we reach for them?

Jenny posted this picture of Ian, asleep after a morning of playing at the park. It touched me, as I recalled his mother in much this same repose. "Ah, time doth stop for no man." Sleep well, sweet prince.

2007-09-21T17:16:00.000-05:00

O the Raggedy Man, he works fer Pa;

An' he's the bestest man ever you saw.

He comes to our house every day,

An' waters the horses, an' feeds 'em hay;

An' he opens the shed, an' we all ist laugh

When he drives out our little old wobble-ly calf;

An' nen, ef our hired girl says he can,

he milks the cow fer 'Lizabuth Ann.

Ain't he a' awful good Raggedy Man?

Raggedy, Raggedy, Raggedy Man.

Why, the Raggedy Man, he ist so good,

He splits the kindlin' an' chops the wood;

An' nen he spades in our garden, too,

An' does most things 'at boys can't do.

He climbed clean up in our big 'ole tree

An' shooked a' apple down fer me

An' 'nother 'n', too, fer 'Lizabuth Ann

An' 'nother 'n', too, fer The Raggedy Man.

Ain't he a' awfully kind Raggedy Man?

Raggedy, Raggedy, Raggedy Man.

Once when he wuz makin' a bow-'n'-arry fer me

Says "When you get big like your Pa is

Air you goin' to have a fine store like his?

An' be a rich merchunt an' wear fine clothes?

Er, what air you goin' to be, goodness knows?"

An' nen he laughed at 'Lizabuth Ann,

An' I says "'M goin' to be a Raggedy Man!

I'm ist go' to be a nice Raggedy Man!"

Raggedy, Raggedy, Raggedy Man.

2007-09-16T01:54:00.000-05:00

"A babe in the house is a well-spring for pleasure, a messenger of peace and love, a resting place for innocence on earth, a link between angels and men" ~Martin Fraquhar Tupper

When a baby is looking past you, could it be there's an angel behind you? And when they look into a tree and are captured by the movement of the wind, could it be they see what we have lost sight of? Perhaps that is why then, that we find peace in taking the time to watch the same when we feel its caress upon our face.

2007-09-09T21:14:00.000-05:00

"Wherever they go,

and whatever happens

to them on the way,

in that enchanted place

on top of the world,

two little blondes

will always

be playing.”

to a playmate,

a best friend,

a forever friend.

Thank you for taking time for me.

2007-09-08T23:52:00.000-05:00

My computer appears to be having some serious problems, so Brandon will be looking at it tomorrow for me. I will most likely be offline for several days, just in case you're here and wondering why you haven't seen anything new written lately. This is why.

Have a restful tomorrow and a really great week. Oh yeah, and don't forget to look for something to laugh about, someone to hug, a person to help, and a comfy spot to lay your head~

2007-09-05T00:57:00.000-05:00

I felt the need to write that you are missed and that I've thought of you today and that I've wondered how your day has been. While putting together thoughts and pictures for today's blog on Faith, Family & Friends, I kept scrolling by pictures of you. But these pictures weren't taken today or even yesterday. There are pictures of the others, but so few of you. This really must be corrected. You, me. Two people famous for NOT wanting our pictures taken.

Stacey took this one. And it's so you. I feel you're looking right at me. Taken at the fair. A place you love. With those you love. You're relaxed. Happy. Well, as happy as one can be in scorching heat with little air. But you've never been one to complain.

So~the next time we're together I am going to take more snapshots of you. To remind me of what I'm missing when I'm not with you. I love you, peanutbutter.

2007-08-31T09:05:00.000-05:00

Bryan Martin was murdered Wednesday night as he returned from a Biscuits game. He had merely stopped to pick up a few items to take home to his wife and two very young children. Such a senseless and random act, all for the sake of stealing his F150 pickup ~ which was spotted on the Eastern Blvd. by police at 9 am the next morning.

Our little community has been rocked and brought to its knees. This couple grew up together, fell in love, and stayed in the area to make a home for their 2 year old son and 3 month old daughter. His wife has such a difficult road ahead. I taught Kelsey and knew Bryan. Both with much love for each other and their fellow man. Both with dreams for the future and the motivation to make them happen.

Take a moment to pray for this situation and for all of us. Ask God to continue believing in America and that He give us the courage to try and make a peaceful difference in our world.

2007-08-29T15:25:00.000-05:00

“I would rather live my life as if there is a God and die to find out there isn't, than live my life as if there isn't and die to find out there is.” ~Albert Camus

2007-08-24T10:10:00.000-05:00

"Last night we had a lightning storm (at least I think that’s what it was ~ we didn’t get any rain to my knowledge) and it was beautiful. Since we were in the car on the way home, it was the first time Ian had really seen lightning. He said it scared him and I took this opportunity to incorporate God. I asked who made the lightning and Ian said, “God. God, please make the lightning go away because it scares me. Mommy, God’s going to make the lightning go away because it scares me.” How it warms my heart to see his faith grow!" ~Jenny Maddox

and so we have His little ones to renew our faith and hope for the unseen~we are so blessed.

Forever and a Day~

2007-08-15T00:31:00.001-05:00

“If you live to be 100, I hope I live to be 100 minus 1 day, so I never have to live without you.” ~Winnie the Pooh

Switch on the Night

2007-08-12T21:53:00.000-05:00

It's getting late and I'm getting sleepy. This is a time I enjoy looking forward to. You see, I love our room. The previous owner had painted the walls a nice chocolate color and although I never would've had the nerve to choose that color, I do so love it! It's like being wrapped in a soft cocoon. Especially at night, snuggled under my comforter with the fan creating breezes and the sound machine set to sounds of the ocean. Since the accident, I've taken more naps and slept later than I ever have. And I enjoy it. I relish it even.

Darkness has never frightened me. Now, I've been frightened at night before. When one of the girls was sick or Johnny. But never of the dark itself. I read a story once that asked this: "Have you ever noticed that when you switch off the light, you switch on the night?" The lesson being, that to notice the beauty of the night, you have to 'switch off the light'. It's a warm short story encouraging children not to be afraid of the dark. So during the upcoming days find time to switch off the lights and switch on the night. And rest well, dear friends~

2007-08-11T16:54:00.000-05:00

"No matter where you go, no matter what you do; I will always, always, always love you."

I can't think of anything that one of our daughters could do that would cause me to quit loving them. What awful, terrible thing would have to take place that would cause me to turn my back and cease to love them? I've thought of mothers that have children sitting on death row, or those with adult children that wear a perverted label given to them by the court system. As bad as people are and as bad as things can be, there's still that mother's love.

Sure, I've been angry, hurt, sad. But I can honestly say I've never, ever stopped loving them. Even when my actions didn't back up those words. There were times I had to practice tough love, times when my words were harsh. Sometimes too harsh. But I never stopped loving them. I've never regretted having them in my life.

The quote isn't original. No, it comes from a beautifully written film called "The Electric Grandmother". I saw it many years ago and fell in love. Written by Ray Bradbury and released in 1982, it's about a family whose children are traumatized by the death of their mother. They go to an old factory, where they customize a new grandmother, and within a short time, she arrives. The boys are charmed. The daughter, however, still misses her mother and she bears no welcome for this interloper. Maureen Stapleton is the grandmother and Edward Herrmann is the father.

Netflix doesn't carry it, but I did find it on a Goggle Search. It's worth the change to buy it.

So, my beautiful girls. The daughters of my heart. No matter where you go; no matter what you do. I will always, always, always love you~

2007-08-09T17:22:00.001-05:00

"If you have faith, . . . it will happen." Matthew 21:21

God always rejoices when we dare to dream

In fact, we are much like God when we dream

He wrote the book on making the impossible possible

Eighty-year-old shepherds don't usually play chicken with Pharoahs

but don't tell that to Moses

Teenage shepherds don't normally have showdowns with giants

but don't tell that to David

And for sure don't tell that to God

2007-07-31T08:59:00.000-05:00

Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,

and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible without surrender,

be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly;

and listen to others, even the dull and the ignorant;

they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons,

they are vexations to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others,

you may become vain and bitter;

for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;

it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs;

for the world is full of trickery.

But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;

many persons strive for high ideals;

and everywhere life is full of heroism.
Be yourself.

Especially, do not feign affection.

Neither be cynical about love;

for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment

it is as perennial as the grass.
Take kindly the counsel of the years,

gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.

But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.

Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline,

be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe,

no less than the trees and the stars;

you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you,

no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
Therefore be at peace with God,

whatever you conceive Him to be,

and whatever your labors and aspirations,

in the noisy confusion of life

keep peace with your soul.
With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,

it is still a beautiful world.

Be cheerful.

Strive to be happy.

2007-07-30T22:31:00.000-05:00

"You are today where your dreams have brought you. You will be tomorrow where your dreams will take you."

2007-07-28T17:10:00.001-05:00

A Hero in My Eyes

Life is full of wonders

and things we can't explain

buildings, towers, spaceships,

sunshine, thunder, rain.

There's so many blessings

in the beauty of our world

vast, living oceans,

a tiny hand unfurled.

You're a wonder yourself

just being in our lives

I needed you to know

you're a hero in my eyes.

another year without me~

2007-07-25T21:31:00.000-05:00

So, here it is. Another school year. Another year without me. Another teacher in my classroom. My classroom!! As much as I've enjoyed my lazy mornings, as much as I've enjoyed my time at home with my family I'm still looking forward to being back in the routine I've been familiar with for almost 21 years now. The year I had to leave was left with unfinished business. I need to finish a school year in the normal way. The way I like to finish a year!

I spent the afternoon, and into the early evening, with one of my bestest friends. Lisa teaches in the room next to mine and she's already talking of the classes, the new programs, the new teachers. I had to keep reminding myself that this time next year I would be back! I'm looking forward to it.

This break has been great for allowing me the time visit our girls in Mississippi and come home on Sundays knowing I don't have to go to work Monday morning! And it's given me much time with Jenny and her boys. Jen and I talk at least once a day and I'll miss the impromptu calls. Ian has even called and I look forward to more of his calls. Being home when Johnny gets in has been real nice! Most nights we've already had supper by 5:30. When I'm working, he gets in first and I'm doing good to get home by 4:30. And that's with NO meetings after school.

It would be interesting if you would leave me a comment and let me know what you look forward to in the near future. Hope is a warm feeling and allows one to rise above the stresses of the day to look ahead with a smile. Have a beautiful evening and until~

Picking Up the Pieces

2007-07-18T23:55:00.000-05:00

Wow, found this blog upon accident and was surprised to catch up with past writings. I have another blog that's family oriented, so I think I'll continue this one with writings that never got published. I've published pieces before, but the ones close to my heart are those that only mean something to me. So if you choose to come back, you'll see what I'm talking about. Until then, may you find hidden moments of laughter and smiles~