There are times

when words are better left

unspoken

Old photos have always captured my attention. And my imagination. Why would an old photo be relinquished to strangers? How did it get outside the family realm? Who are they? They loved, they laughed. They lived. What did they dream of and did they live long enough to see those dreams take flight? What memories did they leave in the hearts of those that knew them?

There's a blog I frequent, and just recently found, that offers images to those that might find some creative use for them. I have no thoughts of being crafty and reusing this, preferring instead to study it and let my thoughts wander.

They don't look that far back into the past, yet clothing tells us about a particular period. The half smiles on their faces let us know they are comfortable and at ease. What were they thinking as they stood there?

I've chosen a few others for you to gaze upon and let your mind take you to another time, another place. What do you find yourself thinking as you see these children? When I found the class shot, I immediately thought, "I wonder how many of these became doctors or pursued politics? How many became mothers, nurses, teachers?" Leave me a comment or two and share your thoughts with me. And as always, may we all find moments to love, times to laugh, and to live as if this were our last day on earth~

The Look~

I love how she looks into the camera. Looks at me with laughter in her smile and that little gleam of adventure in her eyes. Her hands clasped, but not tightly. Just enough to let her know that she still has a hold on life. Note the little finger, the one that's a bit separated from the rest. One might say that she is beginning to relax and enjoy what life is bringing her way. You'd never know that just a little over two years ago her world fell apart. Changed. Forever. The future was rewritten.

They were high school sweethearts. He didn't just love her, he adored her. They married, he joined the Air Force, and they traveled. Saw places most of us only dream of seeing. Visited ruins and castles. Brought two beautiful children into the world. A boy, named after his father, and a daughter. A perfect family. There are no perfect families. Each have their own trials. Children move through the teenage years, finances get tight, and so on.

Throughout it all, though, they pampered each other, supported each other, and lived to help the other. They were close to the King and found such pleasure in their church family. They worshipped together. And it was so good.

The children grew up, married and moved away. Empty nesters now, he brought her breakfast in bed each and every Saturday. Those of us that knew and loved them would tease, wanting such treatment ourselves. And we watched the way he looked at her, following her with his eyes. We spoke, amongst ourselves, of the love that was so evident, so real, so absent in today's world. And they planned. They planned for their future,

their retirement and the golden years. Saving their money over the years, they'd managed to have almost enough to purchase a bed and breakfast ~ something they'd dreamed of over the years of traveling and staying in homes across the world. They were so well suited for it and we knew they would find not only success with this venture, but that they would delight in the strangers that crossed their threshold. Then,

he began to feel bad. For someone so healthy, so in shape, we worried. After too many tests, too many doctors, and too little time, a diagnosis was given. The news wasn't good. In fairy tales, it is. In the real world, it seldom is. And so they planned not for the golden years,

but for the years they would be apart. Now living each day became a challenge. So much to do, and so little time. For him, it was to make sure she would be well taken care of, that she understood how the household would need to be maintained, and he tried, oh how he tried, to prepare her. She lived trying to make it easy for him, being strong for him, letting him know each and every moment how she loved him, had loved him, and would always love him. They took a last trip together, to Canada, to a quaint bed and breakfast and fell in love all over again, as if it were the first time. And we watched.

We watched as they both withered away. He with the cancer, and she with the ever present knowledge that he was leaving. And so he did, on New Year's Eve, 2005. She woke the first day of a new year without him. And we celebrated his life with a memorial service in the middle of a raw and cold January. And our hearts stung from the unfairness of it all. They, who were so in love, so true to each other and to their feelings, to be separated so soon. More than one of us would have traded places with him. He left this earth, and she woke each morning without him.

The first year was harder than she ever thought it could be. Staying busy, staying focused, wondering how she would get up the next morning. But she did. She learned so much that first year without him beside her, in the physical sense of the word. He did well in preparing her for this, but how do you teach someone to live without you. How do you really teach that? And she grew.

Slowly, day by day, she began to draw strength from the memories and, dropping the cloak of heaviness, she allowed Him to wrap her in comfort and guidance. Once again, she began seeing the beauty and freshness of Life that had dimmed with the news of his illness. She found that laughing didn't mean he was forgotten, that smiling at another didn't mean she was disloyal, and that life doesn't stop with dying. We who knew them know that he would be so proud.

So she looks at me, with laughter in her smile and that little gleam of adventure in her eyes. Her hands are clasped, but not tightly. Just enough to let her know that she still has a hold on life. She is happy. She is strong. And she plans.

"Look at the land with your own eyes, since you are not going to cross this Jordan. But commission Joshua, and encourage and strengthen him, for he will lead this people across and will cause them to inherit the land that you will see."
~Deuteronomy 3:27b-28

Moses led the people of Israel out of Egypt and in the wilderness, but did not get to enter into the Promised Land becauseof his sin. Yet, for all those years, Moses nurtured and prepared the person who would do what he could not do. That person was Joshua. Who are you training, molding, encouraging, motivating, and calling to do what you won't be able to do? What successor will take your dreams farther than you can? Who is your Joshua?

This was my devotion today from Heartlight and it made me stop and wonder. Powerful words, sobering thought. So, who is YOUR Joshua?

i believe in pink, i believe that

laughing is the best calorie

burner. i believe in kissing,

kissing a lot. i believe in being

strong when everything seems

to be going wrong. i believe

that happy girls are the

prettiest girls. i believe

that tomorrow is another day & i

believe in miracles.

~audrey hepburn

How wide is Your love

That You would stretch Your arm

And go around the world
And why for me would a Savior's cry be heard

I don't know

Why You went where I was meant to go

I don't know

Why You love me so

Those were my nails

That was my crown

That pierced Your hands and Your brow

Those were my thorns

Those were my scorns

Those were my tears that fell down

And just as You said it would be

You did it all for me

After You counted the cost

You took my shame, my blame

On my cross

How deep is Your grace

That you could see my need

And chose to take my place

And then for me, these words I'd hear You say

Father no

Forgive them for they know not what they do

I will go

Because I love them so

~On My Cross by FFH

I love this picture. Happiness, total abandonment of joy. Ian, playing soccer with his dad, in the sunshine of youth. Oh to be able to capture that feeling of agelessness once more. That feeling that there's no tomorrows, just the glorious moment at hand. I choose to live more moments in just this way. Thanks, Jen, for sharing this picture, but moreso for reminding us we need to give the child in us a chance to come forth.

"I cannot live without books" ~ Thomas Jefferson

Be not forgetful to entertain strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares. ~Hebrews 13:2

I feel very strongly, even moreso since the accident, that angels are near, especially during times when they are most needed. I also feel very strongly that we need to take the time to acknowledge them and to thank God for their presence. Let's rid ourselves of the scales the world has put upon our eyes and pray that He allow us to witness these heavenly beings He sends to help, to comfort, and to guide. They don't have to be in white robes with strong wings attached behind the shoulders. She may be sitting beside you in the doctor's office when you're afraid and weary; he may help you with a dropped package in the grocery line; who said, who wrote that they have to be anymore than what we need at that time? The next time you open your eyes after a prayer, leave them open so you can witness His work. And may you continue to remain fascinated by this beautiful earthly home, for you won't believe how much more Paradise is~

for just one day, one moment even, if I could just hold her in my arms again and feel her short legs, ripe with babyfat, wrap around my waist. to have her soft curly hair brush my face as she nuzzles in closer to my neck and I smell that milky breath that, to this day, I know in my dreams. to have her pull Baby Fields closer to our hearts that are separated merely by the clothes we wear and to know that she is already learning to love. I sing and murmur love songs, songs that will lull her into that place known as Sleepy Town, where best friends are the ones with floppy ears, loved coats, and sometimes missing an eye, or a leg. Maybe this is our saving grace~these memories. To right all the times we were too impatient, too busy, too absent. Maybe these times of rocking chairs, lullabies, stolen kisses on the eyelids and nuzzles of the neck~memories take hold and we savor them and wish, oh how we wish, to have them once more. Just. One. More. Time. it is because of you that I believe in miracles~

So I ran across this, right, while reading through a favorite blog of mine and clicked on it just out of curiosity! Here's my fairie name. I thought it ironic and oh so neat that it's the fairy that loves Winter, just as I do! What's your fairy name?!

Your fairy is called Berry Goblinfrost

She is a bringer of riches and wealth.

She lives in fruit orchards and vineyards.

She is only seen during the first snow of winter.

She wears red, cerise and purple berry colours. She has gentle green wings like a butterfly.

Get your free fairy name here!

My birthday is this month and it's been such a happy time thus far. And the best thing is that it's only getting better. I'm becoming more comfortable with knowledge that I won't be returning to my classroom next schoolyear. Johnny is truly enjoying having me home and I get to see so much of Jenny and her family. There's been more time for friends, more time to read, to rest, to just walk outside and listen to the wind. Life is so fragile and that was deeply impressed upon me during the recovery period. What we can't change must be accepted, dealt with, and a way found to enjoy the difference. I do believe I'm finding it. And it's a very peaceful acceptance.

It Happened

Earlier this evening I came across something I've never seen before. Four pages of paper with scribbling and phrases written on both back and front. I don't recall ever seeing them, but I was the author. They were among some papers in a drawer of our desk and were written in the days immediately following the accident. I do not feel like going into the scribblings nor all of the phrases. They hurt too much. I do want to tell you, though, of one~

"I saw ddy"

this one written phrase ripped through my heart. Proof that I did see him, that I did want to go to him, and that I was sent back. Proof that the accident did happen, that it changed our lives, that it is in the past, and that life does go on. But it hurts and I don't think crying will ever make it go away.

It's my birthday month!

and you know what?

I think I'll celebrate all month!

I intend to do just that. Every day, for the rest of my life~

A dear friend of ours made a recent trip to Moscow and took some amazing pictures. This one struck me for several reasons. First of all, it's amazing in the colors and ornate touches. And yet this was built in a communist country where beauty was not shared with everyone~only the elite. Secondly, that I would never have expected to see a building like this in Moscow. I had a very different image of Moscow and her architecture. Snapshots such as this one caused me to go online and look at other buildings just as ornate, just as colorful. Thanks, Jim France, for bringing this new knowledge and beauty to my world~

A dear friend sent a video that just touched my heartstrings and I wanted to share it with you. Apparently this is someone that is trying out much like the American Idol show and this is his act, if you will. It's on YouTube and I hope you can just click and see it. I think he has talent and what is sung has always been one of my favorite songs for decades. In fact, it was played at our Jenny's wedding and brought tears to many. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did and that it brings a smile to your heart just as it did to mine. And as always, may you have a very blessed tomorrow~
Terry Fator, What a Wonderful World

This image grabbed my heart. And wouldn't let it go. O precious Lord, how great Thou Art.

A friend of mine, Angela Reese, took this picture as she and her family were hiking Rag Mountain in Virginia. Never heard of the area, but when I saw this snapshot of a creek they crossed, it hit me~our sins and our past wash away just as this water flows over its stones and debris. I love the way God uses subtle nudges to remind us of His presence and His love. There are times I feel so insignificant and unworthy of all that He has provided for. What an awesome, awesome Father I worship and adore.

If you read my family blog, you already know that Friday afternoon was heartrending for us. It is still resounding through our hearts and minds. We took time today to just be alone and allow Him to comfort us and for us to acknowledge the many blessings we've received. We know He is in control; we know He will prevail; and we know, without a shadow of doubt, that He will continue to bless us even with the challenges thrown at us. Just like the stones and debris this water flows over, He will continue to take us over the obstacles. Thank you, Father, for loving us so much~I shall continue to praise you and tell others how great You are.